05 August 2011

august

yeah... finally, its august.. exam is over and now HOLiDAY!!! semester break now! my schedule is full tis sem break! Dinner, party, prom, Sabah, travel and etc... It's gonna be a very unforgetable holiday. =)
something hope to share but I really don't know how to tell because it's just like a dream, a drama. I tought it won't happen in my life but now, its happening. Its so so so diffilt to believe. I'm now in a trouble. I'm so helpless...
what had happened? sorry to my readers because I really can't tell. Its very serious. What I can say is only Sorry... I will tell once The problem had solve. so, friend, please don't ask me what happen because I wont tell.
A hundred thousand sorry to dear because I didn't find him this week. Sorry because I busy on my own thing and ignore you. Sorry if I did anything make you feel unhappy. Sorry for everything. Start from last saturday, we didn't often contact each other. 3 or 4 message per day. Shouldn't be like this... I should become maide if we just 3 or 4 message per day. BUT, now, I won't like before anymore. Being crazy if you ignore me. cry like a stupid when saw those photo you with other girls. Now, I had change. I don't even care anymore. I don't care about it anymore. I dn't cRe whether you got find me or not. I don't care on which girl had took photo with you anymore. Even how close, I already don't care. I'm now start to be the girl you want me to be. Izit good? I don't know.
Can I tell you something? I think I had change. I change a lot this few day. I had thought many things about us this few day. Time change me or you change me? Or someone else change us? I really don't now. Did you feel that I had changed? Are you happy with it? Tell me if ou fee happy.
I always think that life is just like a movie. We are the main character. Everything can happen without your expection. You don't now what will happen on next. You can expect everything. What you think, it may not come true... What you never think, It may come true. In real life, we always think that movie is just a movie. It won't happen in our real life. Try to think back something... Izit almost same as the movie that you had watch before?Or future?
Life is not that easy. Everytime you need to face different thing that happen on you. You will face problem. You need to solve the problem. The hardest thing for me is making decision. Two choose one. Can I say that I don't want to chose? I have have all? Can I greedy? Can I be selfish? Can I? But I know the answer. We can't be greedy. Sometimes, you need to choose. Only one. You know why I don't like to make decision? Why I don't like to choose? Because Its hard. I don't know how to choose. I scare I will regret once I decide. I scare I will make a wrong decision.I scare everything. Someone told me,cannot be greedy. You can only have one. You have to choose either one. You can't have two at the same time. You can't. no matter how hard, you stil have to choose at the end because It's life.
So, tell me how to make decision... Just like the theory that I had learned? few steps of decisin making. Izit that easy? I hope so. I will make the decision as soon as possible. I just need time to understand myself on what am I thiking right now. What do I need right now? I need time... Give me some time and I will tell you my decision once I got it. It wont take too long time... Maybe a week? Can?