alone

I'm so so so tired this few day. Didn't get enough sleep. I think I gonna get sick soon if continue like this...
Well... A lot of things gone through my mind today. I think of many thing. I know, I change a lot. I shouldn't be like this?Some one told me that I had changed. Did I? When I think of that only I realized. Yes. I changed a lot. Become selfish, dun care about others anymore. What had changed me? I don't know.Being selfish just the way to protect myself from get hurt from others. When I think of others, did they think of me at the same time? I don't know. Maybe yes? Maybe no... Who knows?  Only the person will know.
 Now... I have no friends in college... Seniors who went to internship last semester had came back. I tot I will be more happy when they come back. I always think that I can go for lunch, shopping , play with them But, things doesn't happen. They don't talk to me because of some reason. I know I can't do anything because I'm the one who make it happened. And, what happen is happening. I can't change it even I change my decision. It's already in my mind when I make the decision. It's okay if you guys don't talk to me. Go for lunch but didn't invite although I'm there. So call FRIEND??? I don't know.
Everything are just fine for me. Use to be alone... I can eat alone, watch movie alone, study alone, shopping alone. It's doesn't matter.